kamsahamida JU NIM

Open the eyes of my heart, LORD.

I want to see you.

Kam sa ha mi da, JU NIM.

expiry date

I love chocolate. I bought them. I kept them. I wished to eat them slowly. I decided to spoil myself with them, slowly. But, I forgot that they will expire. I thought I'm able to do many things by myself. No, I'm just incapable. I know I should leave them all to you because you are there.

Where are you when I need you the most?

Do you feel it when I feel bad?

Do you understand it when I say nothing at all?

Jesus, I'm nothing without you.

I'm sorry, Lord, for what I've made.

I hate you

It's not my fault. It's your fault. I've get enough of this. I don't want to be here. Let me go. You, shut up. I really hate you now.

Do you know who are you? Why you have to say those words?

you you you

I saw you and you ruined my day. It supposed to be a nice day, at least without anything that make me feel disastrous. But you, you appeared. I said, just get lost. We will fade out in each other's life. How could I do that? I'm so stupid. You are in my life, influencing my daily life. I actually decided to post my old town's coffee and pizza i had today, and I found that I can't do any of them now. You just ruined my day. I don't want to see you. Maybe, I want. Talk to me.

the hotate outing

A great outing with CY today. At first we went to cafe for his vacant. I hope that he can get this job, so I think we will meet very often then since the cafe is just next to my shop. Then we went to parkson. Yea we bought something for someone. Hope the someone will like it. I think it means a lot. I bought a pen for my mummy as well. I think the mechanical pencil is nice with the words craved on it. I hope that mummy will like it as her birthday present. It will be something that will assist her in her dream. After that we went to Sushi King for lunch. We enjoyed our bentos and the pricey COOKED scallop sushi.

the very pricey hotate sushi.

we enjoying our kodomos

beloved sansan

It was a happy outing with sansan today, we didn't do much things. We went to the cafe and 100Yen and this outing is about drinking and eating continuously. Both of us are poor though. We spent our very last ringgits for our stomach. Whee. That's something happy. It was a lot of chatter today, and this is how we usually spend our time together. I don't know if we talked things repeatedly, at least we don't end up in silence. But I think, if we end up in silence, it will still feel good. They said that when there is love, we will feel good even without any conversations. Sansan, strive for your dream ♥

precious tudor gold

This was given by CY when i'm sad. Everything given by CY should be treasured because he is seriously not generous. That's why i treasured it. I kept it for so long and I ate it just now. It didn't taste as nice as I thought it would. But it reminded me of our friendship, how precious it is. In my life, he is a special one. I told him i wanted to invent a pillow or bolster stuff that feels like his chubby stomach. It will be so comfortable. Those fat ones always make me feel close. Missing you, CY.

better in time

It is true. Things will get better in time. We are being hurt and we will be learning from it. After all the bitterness, you will then taste the sweetness of the dark chocolate. And this is so called life. It can't be denied, you lied to me and it had hurt me. I won't blame on you now. Because of you, I learnt and I grew up. Life won't be called life without Lies, Issues, Fake and Egoism.

This is so called L.I.F.E

hesitation

You guys had lost your minds. Think before you speak. These, aren't right. And you, you get lost please. I don't need you anymore.

black liar

Sometime I do think that I'm stupid, foolish, and funny. Why could I trust you for so many times without doubting you even a little? I'm not a saint, I commit sins. But you are just making me worse. Because of you I became bizarre. Even though I know I'm nothing but I still believe in you. Do you know that it is enought? Seriously, I've got enough of this. Please, stop this. Leave me. Please, don't talk to me anymore. Don't linger here. Just leave me alone. This is the first time I think that I'm really someone stupid. Thank you.

the dinner

It's the first reunion dinner and it was nice. The fish the meat the vege the beancurd and the beer, they are a great match. Daddy reached Ipoh and we left shop at seven. Grandma cooked soup for us. Surprisingly enough, this time daddy went to grandma's house as well. Okay, maybe he have no choice, but this is something happy. We sat down and have our soup and then we left for our dinner. I'm so happy that we drink beer together, the cheers, the first drop of beer in throat is so nice. I love the rush that isn't bitter at all. It tastes so sweet. A beautiful beginning, I pray that it will be a happy story following. There's nothing my GOD can't do.

2010'S FIRST REUNION

I wonder, hah, do people only go blogging when they are depressed? I'm just trying not to make my blog look too sad. But yea yesterday wasn't too cheerful. I thought I will be happy to see mummy. She started to scold me once she saw me. That's yea, very depressing. After that, it's okay. I didn't talked back. Forget it.

Hmm, I think a family can eat together is considered something happy. So I think today we will dine together. Daddy is coming back from KL. Jesus I pray and I pray. Make this family happy and sweet.

Oh yea, tomorrow sansan will go for her interview. I think that it's something big for her, good luck! If she requested me to go KL with her, I will definitely accept her request. However, I'm not needed. So, that's okay. Yea I think she doesn't need me, lolx. Duh, she looks smart with the formy wear.

And, I hope that tomorrow's outing will be fine. Remmy, John and Eth.

Good luck, everyone.

the sweet nougat

I like to eat nougat because when I bite on it, it reminds me about the taste of chocolate. Both are sweet and cheering. Chocolate is cheering, nougat is satisfying. If I am going to spend twenty bucks to buy a pack of nougat to someone to cheer him/her up, I'm willing to. And yea, seriously, I don't think that it is wasting money. Nougat, it isn't cheap. However, it isn't that pricey. I don't like the way you talk to me. I had been waiting for more than two weeks and I thought tomorrow will be a happy day. But, sorry, you just ruined it! I told myself to talk to you nicely, but you aren't talking to me nicely either. Of course I do treasure you as someone important in my life. Okay, maybe I have issues as well. But, stop it. This is torturing me. I just want to have normal life. A happy one. Without arguments.

I MISS EU ♥

say welcome to sansan~

the precious one in my life.

the one who i really treasure a lot.

the one who i would have rot without her in my life.

you know how much i miss you?

so many days we didn't meet.

i missed you like crazy.

it's happy to know you will be here, reading my blog.

you said this may be the only way we get to know each other's life in the near future.

SO.

♥ please come, oftenly. ♥